Can I Regain My Wife’s Trust?


My wife recently caught me looking at Internet pornography. I have repented, but she does not know whether she can ever trust me again. Is there anything I can do to regain her trust? 

Sexual sin, such as viewing pornography, is secretive by nature. In essence, you have been deceiving your wife. Perhaps you have even told her that you weren’t having any struggles. At the very least, I would think that you’ve hidden the fact that you were still indulging in pornography. She didn’t know you were involved with it until she caught you. In other words, by your words and actions you have conveyed a false message. 

You say that you have repented and I would assume that you sincerely want to put this secret sin behind you. The problem is that there is a track record of deception that must be overcome. Rebuilding trust in a relationship takes time. 

There is something you can do to gain real victory over sin and rebuild trust at the same time: Get on fire for God! If you really give yourself over to seeking Him in a real and passionate way, your entire value system will change. The desire for pleasure and worldly entertainment will diminish. The things of God will become increasingly more desirous. Not only will this weaken the temptation for sin, but your wife will see the very real change that is taking place within you. No amount of convincing arguments you could concoct can rebuild trust like becoming a different man than the one who has been so attracted to evil in the past.