Abused by Men. Loved by God.
I am no stranger to the pain of sexual and emotional abuse. During my younger years, I suffered at the hands of several males - including being raped. This pattern of abuse continued into my marriage of 13 years whereI was subjected to constant criticism and the pain of my husband's unfaithfulness. By the time I enrolled in the Pure Life Ministries At-Home Program for Wives, there were very few men I believed I could trust.
I began counseling soon after my husband left to go through the Pure Life Ministries Residential Program. It was much different from any counseling my husband and I had ever received. Instead of receiving pity, or spending time digging up the past, my counselor pointed me to Scripture so that I could see what the Lord wanted to speak to me now. I took a deeper look at what Christ endured because of His great love for us. I started to examine what He said about forgiveness, confession, repentance, humility, submission, and much more.
Up to this point, I had always thought of myself as a forgiving person. But I began to see that bitterness had taken root within my heart, and that I, too, had become a very critical person.
Yet, in the face of all my sin, I also received a real revelation of God's love for me. I learned that I cannot look to others for my joy and fulfillment - they will only come from the Lord. With Him by my side, I can endure whatever comes my way. No matter what happens, I know my life and my salvation are secure in His hands.
Before Pure Life Ministries, my focus was completely on creating a happy marriage. I had tried unsuccessfully for years to make my husband happy with me. This desire to please him was greater than my desire to please the Lord. But now I was learning to place my husband in God's hands, and as my relationship with Jesus grew deeper, He began to create a peace in my heart that I had never before experienced.
Since my husband and I have gone through the Pure Life Ministries counseling programs, the Lord has restored our marriage. It has not always been an easy road, but with God's help we have been able to overcome our difficulties. I continue to let go of my fears and place my husband's life, our marriage, and our children into God's hands. I can testify with Scripture that God truly is able to give us a "peace that surpasses human understanding."
My time with the Lord has become a vital part of my life. One passage of Scripture that remains precious to me is Psalm 139:23-24, "Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends You, and lead me along the path of everlasting life." It is there in His presence that He is able to do His tremendous work in my heart. Sometimes it's uplifting and sometimes it's heart piercing, but it always leaves me with a greater revelation of His mighty love!
Copyright © 2018 by Pure Life Ministries. Permission is granted to use, copy, distribute, or retransmit information or materials on this page, so long as proper acknowledgment is given to Pure Life Ministries as the source of the materials, and no modifications are made to such material.