Look at the biblical teaching about the mercy of God. See how God bestows great mercy on the repentant sinner, but requires the recipients of mercy to be merciful towards others.

Our Biblical Counselors discuss the transforming work God does in men's lives as they learn to be givers of mercy, and how mercy sets a man free from his sin.

Victory over the stronghold of sexual sin is possible and there are many testimonies of men who have found freedom from the hold that it had on their lives. But whether or not a person experiences true freedom is largely determined by whether or not they are sincere in their pursuit of freedom.

Those who are sincerely seeking freedom and have the hope of salvation within them will never stop striving to get the victory for the sake of their relationship with God. Those who are insincere will only do enough to fool themselves and those around them.

In this episode, biblical counselor Jim Lewis looks at some indicators of sincerity and insincerity to help a person determine whether or not they have had a genuine conversion experience.

Is it possible for a man who has truly been saved to still find himself battling with sexual sin?

That question cannot be answered without first looking at the Bible says about true salvation. The Apostle Paul himself wrote to professing Christians and admonished them to test themselves to see if they were truly in the faith. For those who struggle with sexual sin this is all the more vital. So how can a person know whether or not they are truly converted?

In this session biblical counselor Jim Lewis takes us through scripture and points out for us what true and false conversion really look like and gives us the litmus test of the Word of God in which to examine our own hearts and lives.

In this installment in our current series, we look at the role of consecration in men gaining freedom from habitual sexual sin.

Glenn Meldrum defines the term, describes where it appears in Scripture, and then makes application for men who need help. He shows how a life of surrender and dedication makes all the difference in a man getting free.

Above the door of the old Pure Life chapel hung a sign that read: “Sinners Only Allowed.” This short statement was a reminder to us to never to forget that we all are sinners in need of a Savior.

Only the Sick Need a Doctor

The Pharisees once got angry with Jesus because He was eating with sinners. Jesus made an extremely poignant statement that would behoove all of us to consider: “Healthy people don't need a doctor—sick people do. Now go and learn the meaning of this Scripture: `I want you to be merciful; I don't want your sacrifices.' For I have come to call sinners, not those who think they are already good enough.” (Matthew 9:12-13 NLT) The Pharisees were constantly attempting to convince themselves of their own righteousness. Many Christians unwittingly do the same.

When a believer loses sight of the fact that he is an unworthy sinner in the presence of a holy God, he invariably rises up in self-righteous pride. Amazingly, my experience—both personally and with the many men I have ministered to over the years—has been that people who have been deeply involved in sin can often become the worst of Pharisees! We are all unworthy of God’s love and grace and the more we can keep that in mind, the more intimate we will be with God. Those who consider themselves “good” people are in a terrible delusion. It is commendable if they have not given themselves over to outward sin, but they have a depraved nature the same as the rest of us.

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Acknowledging Our Sin, Acknowledges Our Savior

Knowing man’s natural tendency to avoid seeing himself in this light, Jesus told the following parable. Luke hit the nail on the head when he introduced the Lord’s reasoning: “And He also told this parable to certain ones who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and viewed others with contempt:”

Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee, and the other a tax-gatherer. The Pharisee stood and was praying thus to himself, “God, I thank Thee that I am not like other people: swindlers, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax-gatherer. I fast twice a week; I pay tithes of all that I get.” But the tax-gatherer, standing some distance away, was even unwilling to lift up his eyes to heaven, but was beating his breast, saying, “God, be merciful to me, the sinner!” I tell you, this man went down to his house justified rather than the other; for everyone who exalts himself shall be humbled, but he who humbles himself shall be exalted. (Luke 18:9-15)

People who are aware of their unworthiness before God constantly look to Him to supply the righteousness they need to live victoriously in a world of temptations. Those who attempt to maintain their own “goodness” through self-effort never know what it is means to have God’s imputed righteousness. Others who try to make it in the Christian life through a positive mental attitude are also attempting to mask the fact that they are sinners in constant need of God’s help.  It is only as we acknowledge the fact that we are sinners, that we know the forgiveness and freedom that comes with that reality. I will conclude this commentary with the following quote...

The Church is A Society of Sinners

“The church is not an organization of good people, it is an organization of sinners. It is the only organization in human society that takes sinners into its membership just because they are sinners. It is the only organization that keeps on saying week after week, year after year, age after age, ‘We have done those things that we ought not to have done and left undone those things that we ought to have done.’ No other organized body bears in its group consciousness the weight not only of its own members sins but the sins of the whole social order. This is the glory of the church, its uniqueness in human society, that it lives perpetually on the vitality and realism of its own repentance, its contrition, and its plea for God’s help and forgiveness. Let us not claim moral virtue for church members or for the church. Let us rather glory in the fact that the church is a society of sinners, who claim no virtue, but humbly rest their broken and burdened lives upon the grace which God has eternally revealed in Christ Jesus.”(1)

(1) Charles Clayton Morrison. (Stuber, Stanley I. and Clark, Thomas Curtis; “Treasury of the Christian Faith”; New York: Association Press, 1949, p 170-171)

Using Isaiah 6, Jordan Yoshimine talks about how God uses times of worship to transform lives. He teaches us that in worship, we can see the Lord, experience deep conviction for sin, receive cleansing, and then be commissioned by God for service. (From #357 - What Role Does Worship Play in Freedom from Porn?)

Jim: Jordan, I've asked you to come in today to talk to our listeners about the value of worship and the role that worship plays in helping a man gain freedom from addiction to pornography and to sexual sins. And you've been here Pure Life for some years now, and like all of our staff you came through the Residential Program as a student. You have your own testimony about how the Lord used worship in your life. Now you’re Assistant Director of Counseling. You see firsthand the changes in men's lives as they encounter God in worship and the lives of your own counselees. They tell you how God met them in worship services. Besides all that, your seat during worship services is on the platform, and so you have the distinct advantage of being able to see what's going on in the men during the worship services, and I think all this qualifies you in a unique way to speak about the role of worship in the lives of men seeking freedom from bondage to habitual sin. So talk to me, if you would please, about what you've experienced and what you regularly see. How does God use worship in the lives of our men?

Jordan: Yeah, it was an interesting topic when you emailed me about doing a podcast regarding worship. My immediate thoughts went to worship in the church, worship as evidenced in the church today, and I was grieved. My grief was based on what I had experienced in worship before I came to Pure Life, as far as worship was concerned.

Worship at Pure Life Ministries, I believe, is what the Lord really intended for worship to be. Our worship is the singing of praise, the testifying of different people, members of the body, during that service, and it really transformed my thinking about what singing praise songs and worship songs and testifying during services really means. It was a revelation to me.

Jim: Jordan, I see you've opened your Bible. Was there a passage of Scripture that you wanted to share with us today?

Jordan: We’re Biblical Counselors, and so we're going to preach from the Word. So if I did not use a scripture in defining what worship services are like at Pure Life, I would be doing the Lord a disservice and I wouldn't be anchoring it in anything. It would just be my own opinion, so I'm going to anchor it in the Word and then describe what I've seen, It’s Isaiah 6:1-8

In the year of King Uzziah’s death I saw the Lord sitting on a throne, lofty and exalted, with the train of His robe filling the temple. Seraphim stood above Him, each having six wings: with two he covered his face, and with two he covered his feet, and with two he flew. And one called out to another and said, "Holy, Holy, Holy, is the LORD of hosts, The whole earth is full of His glory."

And the foundations of the thresholds trembled at the voice of him who called out, while the temple was filling with smoke.

Then I said, “Woe is me, for I am ruined! Because I am a man of unclean lips, And I live among a people of unclean lips; For my eyes have seen the King, the LORD of hosts.”

Then one of the seraphim flew to me with a burning coal in his hand, which he had taken from the altar with tongs. He touched my mouth with it and said, “Behold, this has touched your lips; and your iniquity is taken away and your sin is forgiven.” Then I heard the voice of the Lord, saying, “Whom shall I send, and who will go for Us?” Then I said, “Here am I. Send me!”

Jordan: I mean, powerful, right? That passage really describes one of the aspects of what happens during worship and what I believe the church is really intended for. Music, worship in services; If you have a walk with God during the week, if you are seeking the Lord, as our students are, they're required to spend 15 minutes in the Word, 15 minutes in prayer, they have homework, they are in Bible studies, they are in prayer groups, and they’re at Pure Life, so the place itself is full of the presence of the Holy Spirit, so throughout the week they are immersed in the Word, they're immersed in prayer, they are practicing the presence of the Lord throughout the week. So when they come to service, their heart is… the pump is primed, so to speak. So when a song comes up that is, like this passage is saying, where they're being confronted with the holiness of the Lord,  we're singing songs about the holiness of the Lord, the Lord has a tremendous opportunity to use that song for a man to see “Wow, this is how holy the Lord is, and this is my condition, this is who I am before a holy God.” Man! Repentance! Just this undoing of the self-life! However, that would not be possible if the man was not inundating himself, immersing himself in the Word, in prayer, and all those things throughout the week. So, if you look at the church today, music and worship, praise songs have become entertainment. But that's not what the Lord intended.

Number one, He intended worship to glorify Himself to bring glory to Himself. But for us, in our Residential Program, we're seeing the effect that a godly life; someone who's walking with the Lord comes into service, sings a song, hears the song, the Holy Spirit comes through the song and does a deep, deep work in bringing a man to repentance, or shedding light on just how merciful the Lord is, or His holiness, or His lowliness, His character.

Jim: One of the things that we pray for, and I know that this is part of your testimony, I know you've seen it in the lives of your men: we pray all the time that men will get a sight of God; that men will get a sight of Jesus, that men will get a sight of the cross. Isaiah said, “I saw the Lord and we're always praying that men will get a heavenly sight. How have you seen this come true for you or for your men?

Jordan: I was taking notes, and I was thinking, interesting how the Lord will use something that happened while I was in the program, and it's just stored away, and I've shared it with a few people but really it was, I know where I was sitting in the chapel. I know the song: the song was called “Knowing You.” And as I was singing the song, and it says, “And I love you, Lord.” And I just started weeping, because for the first time in my life, that meant something. I could say without any hesitation that from the bottom of my heart that was true. I truly loved the Lord. And that was a revelation, it was a revelation of where I had been and where I was now in that moment. And now, every time I hear that song, I am reminded again how worship affects you. You sing some songs over a period of time and what has happened with that song now, what the Lord does with that song is a spirit of gratitude. I listen to that song, I sing that song and I'm so grateful for that moment in time where the Lord revealed Himself to me and said, “Jordan, you really do love Me!” This is actually true in your life, and you can actually sing this with deep conviction and love for Me.”

Worship is amazing, and when you are walking with the Lord, and singing in the Spirit, in an environment where the Holy Spirit is present, there is nothing like worship to the Lord. And then, what the Lord is doing inside of you and giving you that sight of who He is. His holiness, I think, is here in our chapel. We sing a lot about God, about His holiness, not what God does for us, but really, His character. And I really believe that those songs, the songs we choose, really allow the students to see His holiness. When we see God's holiness, we see ourselves before a holy God, we see ourselves rightly. And we're saying, “I am a man with unclean lips. I am a wretch. I am a sinner and in need of repentance.” And so a lot of times, during the worship service, you see men (because I'm up on the platform, as you said)  you see men become undone. They're singing a song, and they begin weeping. And then you see them, and the altar call comes, that same man comes up to the altar, again in tears, and you see him on campus the next week, the next month, and he's a different person. But it was that song again, all the stuff that led up to that service that happens throughout the week, and then God will use a song, or someone testifying as a form of worship, and the Lord uses all of that together, and the culmination is that song, that form of worship where he's singing… Music has that effect on people where He really does something. He goes into people, and they get a sight, and that's it, they're done.

Jim: One of the things that we teach, of course, right out of the Scripture, is that the conviction of the Holy Spirit leads to a godly sorrow, as opposed to the worldly sorrow that they came in with, and that godly sorrow leads to repentance. And repentance is the change that God is looking for. Now often, that happens in the context of a worship service and we get to see it unfold right before our eyes.

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Jordan: Yeah, it's I mean it really is an immense privilege. You know, Jim, you've been in ministry for many years, decades, and me growing up in the church. And not having witnessed this on a weekly basis, you know, we get to see that every week, twice a week services. And then Friday night services, some of our Bible studies, when we're playing worship music or whatever.  It is such a privilege to see men come to the end of themselves and into a walk with the Lord. And it's as simple as a song, and as simple as a phrase from a song, especially when we sing choruses and you sing them 2 or 3 times, that 3rd chorus, that's the one when the Spirit  really hits a person, and the reality of what that chorus says. You know, “You’re my all, You’re the best, You’re my joy. My righteousness, and I love You Lord. Knowing you, Jesus, knowing you, there is no greater thing.” Right? I mean that, for me, just that did it, that undid me. You know, Revelation Song. There's just so many different songs that just… “In Christ alone.”  I mean, just have had a tremendous impact on me, and it is such a privilege to see men come into saving faith, through worship, through worship songs. Even before, I mean, honestly, our songs are before the sermon, and so it had nothing to do with what the pastor said. It's just the Holy Spirit, and using worship as a form of bringing a person into the Kingdom. Amazing!

Jim: Well, going back to our passage in Isaiah 6. He sees the Lord. In light of His Holiness, he is undone. He sees his uncleanness, his total depravity. But God didn't just show him his sin to leave him there. What happened after that?

Jordan: Isn't it amazing how God will use whatever means possible in order to bring us to a place where we surrender our lives to Him. And when we get a sight of the Lord, and here's the thing: we're just talking about one way that the Lord will do this. He does it in multiple other ways. Here at the ministry, and throughout the world, miracles or in the quietness of someone's room, He brings us all to that place, whatever the means, to a place where we see our depravity, and we see our need, and that's exactly what happened to Isaiah. “I am a man with unclean lips.” But God doesn't leave us there. He wants us to admit that, He requires us to admit we are sinners; we are destitute without You. But then He comes in in His mercy. And just says, “Ok. Here you are now cleansed.” And really for us, in the New Covenant, it’s the blood of the Lamb. And we're forgiven of our sins, as far as the east is from the west, so our transgressions are removed from us (2 Corinthians 5:17) We are new creation, the old has passed away; behold, a new creation has come. We're dead, we're dead to our old selves. John 3, Nicodemus, we are truly born again,

But it takes that sight of the Lord, that first part of Isaiah. We need to have that sight of the Lord and see who we are before a holy God. And that's exactly what happened to Isaiah. He saw God's perfect holiness and who he was before a holy God, and he was like, “I'm nothing! I'm a sinner! I don't even deserve to be in Your presence! I don't even deserve… and God, in His mercy, said yes (Wow, what an amazing God) I come and I'm offering you forgiveness and cleansing through the blood of Jesus Christ, and forgiveness of sins. But now there's a responsibility. He's just not going to leave us there.

Jim: Alright, after his purification, after his sin was atoned for, he overheard God saying, “Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?” Talk to me about Isaiah’s response.

Jordan: Yeah, we're called.  He asked us, “What are we going to do with that? What are you going to do with that?” The, it's the call. It's Matthew 28. It is in line with that, and He says, “Whom shall I send?” You've come into something. What are you going to do with it? And Isaiah said, “Here I am, send me.” And I think that was actually a theme for one of our conferences. But it is true; it is a call. “I've seen what you've done for me, Lord. Now I want to return that mercy that You've given to me and go out and make disciples of all nations, to multiply God's mercy.” God's saving faith is not ever for us alone. It's for us to multiply, to go out and do the same for others, in our homes, with our marriage, with our wives, with their children, with our churches, with our community, with our country, with this world.

And especially in these days and times, the call is going out, and I think, the focus in our ministry has always been discipleship, that has been in the benchmark or one of the pillars - but it's there's a sense of urgency. I think now, with the staff, that we are living in perilous times and – this isn't just about bringing a man into faith. It is this call. You know, talking to guys as they're getting ready to graduate, “You have a call on your life and a call to minister God's mercy to others, and so what does that look like?” I really do believe, more now than ever, God's call is shouting a little louder at Pure Life Ministries, for sure.

Jim: It’s a great passage of Scripture, but thank you for showing us how this happens in the lives of our men and how it happened in your life as well. Thanks for coming in today.

As we continue our current series, we discuss the two sides of the work of sanctification: the part only God can do, and our part in cooperating with His work in our lives.

We hear an impassioned plea for men to transition from living a life dedicated to pleasure to living a life dedicated to God, and a graduate shares his testimony of God's sanctifying work in his life.

In his previous post, Luke Gilkerson shared how the anonymity and accessibility of the Internet helped lead him into addiction and revealed who he really was and what he really wanted. Here's what he learned as he sought the radical change he desperately needed...

Performance is Empty

We need to be motivated to obedience, not to performance. These two are radically different activities, though they may look similar on the surface. Performance is when someone plays a part because it’s in the script, the written code, or the rules. Obedience is when someone submits and responds to another person.

There are many true followers of Christ who have developed the habit of performance: their lives are more about mimicking Christian social norms than they are about knowing God. Many Christians also suffer from acute double-mindedness: they sincerely seek to know God and yet simultaneously continue their pattern of outward performance. They feel the pull of the Spirit drawing them to Christ, but they also feel the pull of their sinful heart wanting to keep their “Christian” activities and convictions on the surface, in the realm of performance. These Christians are exposed for what they are when they have the opportunity to sin in secret.

Performance is merely another form of pride and control: we want to display Christian convictions so long as we don’t “sell out” to Jesus and become undying in our devotion to the living Christ. We enjoy the social benefits of a commitment to Christ, but we tell the Spirit, “This far and no farther. Deep down I want my life to be mine, not Yours.” This sin needs to be acknowledged, confessed to God and to our trusted Christian community, and hated as the evil it is.

That being said, real transformation will not happen simply because we have noticed that we are performing and not obeying. That acknowledgment is just the beginning, just the preparation for the real work that God will do.

Obedience is Responsive

For much of my Christian life I spent a good deal of my time trying to muster up the passion to obey God. I read about the lives of great saints, both in the Bible and in church history, and tried to mimic their passion and fervor. I measured my spirituality by how much positive, obedient emotion I could drum up within my heart. This, I believe, was motivated by godly devotion, but was nonetheless a wrong direction.

Obedience is a response. Even the English word “obey” comes from a Latin word for “listen.” Obedience is not something I should try to motivate by looking within myself, but something that I do as a response of looking to God, of listening to Him.

Our initial response to hearing the gospel should set the tone for the whole of our Christian lives, for a life of obedience, not of performance. When we first heard the Good News about Jesus, we understood that the offer of salvation was entirely based on something wonderful that God did, not something we do. With conviction of our sin and a delight in God’s love and power displayed in Jesus, we responded with faith. Thus, the rest of our lives are to follow this pattern: God reveals Himself; we respond.

Obedience is a response to a person, to the incredible God who has revealed Himself in Christ. For some of us, the word “obedience” is tainted in our minds, denoting a concept of cold or stoic action; but it is anything but all of that. Obedience is bringing a smile to the face of God, fully pleasing Him by growing in intimacy and knowledge of Him, patiently enduring in faith amidst the pressures of the world, and joyfully giving thanks at all times to the One who has delivered us from the domain of darkness (Colossians 1:9-14).

This is more than performance: this is the integrity of passion.

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Passion is God-Given

So what are we to do if we desire a life of obedience? We must not try to have a passion for God as much as we simply gaze upon God Himself and let that vision give us passion.

We must be as Moses on Mt. Sinai: we must have a hunger to see God’s glory (Exodus 33:18). We must thirst for the same vision of God that filled the mind of Isaiah in the temple (Isaiah 6:1-8). We must have the hunger of the Greeks who came to Jerusalem for Passover: “We want to see Jesus” (John 12:21). We must have the desire and discipline of Mary of Bethany, who only desired to sit at the feet of Jesus and hear from Him (Luke 10:39). We must behold the mysteries of who He is, especially as He is revealed in His incarnation, the cross, the resurrection, and His second coming.

We cannot obey whom we do not know: only in knowing the living Christ are we changed. Then we are freed, not to live a life of performance, which is what the book of Hebrews calls “dead works” (9:14); instead, we are freed to serve the living God. No longer will we need to be motivated by simply performing to Christian social norms, but we can be free to live out a life of love and devotion to the One who died for us and rose again (2 Corinthians 5:15), whether in public or in secret. Our Father, who sees in secret, is eager to reward the one who earnestly seeks Him (Matthew 6:4,6,18; Hebrews 11:6).

Look on Him whom you have pierced (Zechariah 12:10), look at Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith (Hebrews 12:2), and gaze upon the crucified Christ, now risen, and search the mystery of His justice and love.

Biblical Counselor Jim Lewis discusses the common teachings espoused by many deliverance ministries, and why an experience of deliverance is seldom all that is needed for a man to gain freedom from sexual sin. Our experience has taught us that God is after much more than this one issue. (From #356 - What Role Does Deliverance Play in Freedom from Porn?)

In today’s episode we are asking the question, “What role does deliverance play in a man gaining freedom from pornography and sexual sin?” And even the mention of the word ‘deliverance’ conjures up all sorts of images in people’s minds. Obviously, if we are talking about deliverance, we are assuming that there is something from which a man must be rescued, and that something is demonic influence.

When you listen to the other segments in this podcast, you should be convinced that here at Pure Life, we take very literally and seriously what the Scripture teaches about the nature and work of our enemy the devil, and his demonic hordes. We have an adversary who aims to steal, kill and destroy, and we are called on in Scripture to resist him, and to engage in spiritual warfare. The activity of his hosts of darkness is no less real today than when Jesus walked the earth, and the Gospels abound with accounts of Him delivering men and women from their clutches.

And so people who share this biblical view want to know, do we believe that men in sexual sin need deliverance from demonic possession? Our answer to that question is an unequivocal “yes!” Of course we do. Men in sexual sin have opened wide the door to demonic activity in their lives and desperately need deliverance. Let me share our perspective on this, and how it might be different than some other voices on the subject.

Many people believe that there are demons of lust, that that is their particular assignment and weapon, and that viewing pornography or engaging in sinful sexual behaviors “opens the door” to their activity. Some even use the term that the demons now have “a legal right” to harass and oppress. In effect, we have granted them permission to attack us. And many, it seems, teach that there is a specific ministry of deliverance that one should take advantage of. This ministry often includes prayers designed to gain freedom by binding and loosing demons, casting them out, canceling generational curses, renouncing soul ties, and that these prayers will set the prisoner free.  

Many a soul has been told that the reason they are tempted in the area of sexual sin, the reason they struggle, or are even addicted, is because they have this demon. The demon is the problem, and if they are delivered from the demon, then they won’t struggle anymore. A common side-effect of this teaching is that the sinner now has someone else to blame for his own choices, and his sinful behavior.

The internet is littered with sites offering deliverance prayers that promise you that if you pray these words, there is power in the words themselves to set you free. Now every Christian should believe in the power of prayer, in the need for faith in God, and in the promises of Scripture that God desires that we ask, seek and knock. Jesus told us to pray in faith. But prayer should never be reduced to seeking a “magic formula,” or a “Christian incantation” designed to render the desired effect.  

There is a whole segment of Christian teaching that deals with the area of deliverance, and it seems to be built on a few isolated texts, pulled out of context to create a theology and a methodology of deliverance. If you say these words, or if you can find an anointed person who is a trained practitioner in deliverance, and if you do these specific things, then you will be delivered. That’s what’s out there. Let me just say, that this has never been our experience. A great many of the men who have passed through Pure Life in the last thirty years went the deliverance route first, with great faith and desire, only to come to us for help in the end.

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Now, I hear a listener saying, “So, is the work of the enemy in sexual sin really that small a deal? Because, I really feel completely bound. I know what it’s like to have an overwhelming temptation come upon me, and I feel as if I have no power to resist it. If only I could be delivered from those temptations, I would be fine. Are you saying there’s no need for deliverance?” NO, that’s not what we’re saying.

We absolutely believe that the Enemy has real power over people’s lives. As I said before, his influence is just as real today as it has ever been. What we’re saying is that someone does not need an ‘experience’ of being delivered from a demon. It’s just not that simple.

I know that for the man who is bound by sexual sin, this problem seems insurmountable. It is bigger than you, and if you could get free on your own, you would have done it by now. You need a great deal of help. But we want you to see that God is after so much more in you than just getting rid of your sexual sin. The problem is actually bigger than you thought. That’s why we have been doing this series of podcasts, because it takes more than just a deliverance prayer.

God wants to build your faith. God wants to show you your sin, and make you take responsibility for it, and stop blaming everyone else for your own choices. In other words, He wants to lead you into real repentance. He wants to teach you how to turn from your sin. And He’s after far more than your sexual sin. He wants to root out your anger, fear, anxiety, unbelief, hatred, bitterness, and apathy, He wants to teach you to humble yourself and come way down in your pride. He wants to teach you how to fight and to resist temptation when it comes. He wants to teach you real and complete surrender to His will and submission to His reign over your life. He wants to lead you into biblical consecration, the offering of your life as a living sacrifice. And He wants to lead you into the pursuit of holiness, what the Bible calls our sanctification. This is what God is after in the life of every believer, and not just freedom from one or several life-dominating sinful habits. He doesn’t just want your sexual sin, He wants the transformation of your entire life.

The Apostle Peter wrote, ‘Be sober, be vigilant! Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same experience of suffering is required of your brotherhood throughout the world.” This world is not a playground, but a battleground, and every Christian should remain in the fight. But we are also reminded by John that “greater is He who is in you than he who is in the world.”

Kathy Gallagher shares her testimony of how God began to do a work of repentance in her some 40 years ago, and how that ongoing process is still happening every day of her life.

There is a deeper work of repentance that God wants to do in our lives, and that deeper repentance is necessary for an overcoming life of freedom.  (From #355 - What Role Does Repentance Play in Freedom from Porn?)

Jim: I'm joined in the studio today by Kathy Gallagher, and she is co-founder of Pure Life Ministries and for many years was Director of our Wives Program. Welcome Kathy.

Kathy: Thanks, Jim. Good to be here.

Jim: We're here today to talk about the subject of repentance. Now, when we read the New Testament, we see a strong emphasis laid there on the need for repentance from sin when a person comes to Christ. And even though that is seldom preached in church anymore, it is still the clear teaching of Scripture. Describe for me, if you will, in general terms, what this repentance usually looks like in the life of a new believer.

Kathy: Well, we've had lots of experience around here watching people come into repentance, and in my own life, it's just coming to the realization, in simple terms, that I'm a sinner, and I am in trouble and I need help. And I think people just recognizing that they are separated from God, and there's some desire, something inside a soul that knows they're wrong, but they want to get right. That's very simple, in general.

Jim: So when you came into repentance, what did that look like for you?

Kathy: It was kind of a month’s-long process for me, just an inward disturbance, I would call it. And I knew that I was in trouble spiritually, but I didn't know what any of that stuff meant. I didn't know about sin. I didn't know about repentance. I didn't know anything, but what I did know there was just, inside I knew that if I died, I would go to hell. I don't know why those terms even came into my mind, because I wasn't raised in the church. I didn't know any of these things, but there was just this terrible disturbance inside that I was not right, and eventually, after months of being tortured by this thought — conviction — I was just under tremendous conviction. Of course, I didn't know what that meant, but I just wanted relief from it. I wanted to get right. I was tired of being afraid that God was going to step on me or something. It was terrible. I was living in just absolute torment, but gratefully, I was put in a position to actually deal with my sin issue. Again, I didn't know that I had a sin issue, or what that even really meant, but it was a Baptist pastor who sat me down and he was telling me what the Scriptures said about sin, and that my sins could be washed away, and that I could be made clean, and I jumped all over that, because I knew in my heart that was the issue. And I repented of my sins, August 1, 1979, sitting in my sister's dining room table with a Baptist pastor I'd never met before, and I walked away a new creature, and that was my entrance into the kingdom of God.

Jim: Kathy you said that you repented of your sins. Just for clarification, there are many people who confuse confessing their sins — agreeing with God, saying it out loud — and repenting of those sins. Would you describe for us the difference as you understand it?

Kathy: Well, yeah, confessing is saying, you're agreeing, admitting that you're a sinner. Repentance is turning from that sin and turning from that life, and they’re two totally different things. And you shouldn't confuse one with the other. Yes, we are supposed to confess our sins, that's the beginning, but repentance, real biblical repentance, is turning away from self. Ultimately, that's what it is, turning away from those behaviors, that lifestyle.

Jim: At our annual conference earlier this year, a theme began to emerge that we believe the Holy Spirit was teaching us, that He was calling us to a deeper repentance. Now, when you hear that, that there is a call from God to a deeper repentance, what does that mean to you?

Kathy: Well, I believe, I think this is true, that a lot of Christians think that once you've had that initial “come into the kingdom” experience, that that is it, you did repent. I repented when I got saved, but I believe, and this is been my experience for 40 years as a Christian, and many other saints that I'm close to have had the same experience, that it's a daily thing. It is me submitting myself to a holy God and inviting Him to come and keep cleaning, keep dealing with me, keep showing me, because I know that I have a fallen sinful nature, and that nature did not disappear at salvation. It is still with me, and I know if anybody is honest with themselves, you sin, we sin in life. We say the wrong things, we do the wrong things, we crave the wrong things, and because of that, at least for me, I have constantly asked the Lord for forgiveness and I turn away from known sins. I will, if I sin, for example, if I say something ugly to someone, I will go to that person, I will repent to that person, in tears usually, and I repent to the Lord. So repentance is a lifestyle. It is for me, and we definitely teach that here at Pure Life Ministries, because it is a foundation stone of the Christian life.

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Jim: As God deals with you and you examine your own heart, what are some of the underlying sins of the heart and the disposition, that God calls a Christian to deal with and then turn from?

Kathy: Well, there's a myriad. Where do you begin? In my own life, I'll use my own life as an example, just again, it's attitudes of the heart. For a lot of people, there's anger, there's bitterness, there's covetousness, idolatry, sexual lust, fantasy; there's stuff in us that is contrary to who God is, and we're supposedly being conformed to His image, and so it's not just like sexual sins, or the big sins, you know: we don't smoke, we don't drink, we don't fornicate, that's the evangelical list of do's and don'ts. But I believe, in God's kingdom, it's attitudes of the heart, that can be all kinds of stuff. And attitudes, and hatred, and lust, and bitterness, wrath, anger, malice. I mean, in the New Testament there are several lists, especially from Paul, that he lists out of Christian life behaviors that we should try to attain to, and ungodly things that we should abstain from, repent of and turn away from. So it's like, there is stuff inside of us and it's not just the evangelical list, it is heart attitudes, and I know, for me personally, that I didn't have big outward sins, necessarily. In my journey with the Lord, He's had to go after heart attitudes in me, because that's where my sins reside at, they are residing in my heart; things that people cannot see but God sees. God knows who I am. He's got my address and He goes after those things.

Jim: So, for the man who's listening, who has tuned in because he deals with sexual sin, he might say, “Well, I'm not looking at pornography any more. I'm not engaged in this kind of sexual sin anymore, but what I hear you saying is if he still has anger in his heart if he still is dealing with fear, if he is still a critical judgmental spirit, if he has unbelief, they're just as repugnant to God as any outward manifestation of sexual sins.

Kathy: That's right, yeah. And I don't think God measures one sin from another. I think the difference for us as human beings, looking at sin, for example a wife looking at her husband's sexual sin, would consider that the most heinous crime on the planet. But God doesn't see it like that. It's all separating us from Him, all of these things, and it's all contrary to the life of a Christian. I know, and I’m pretty strong about this, it is the attitudes of the heart that God is going after. It's the sins of the heart that God's going after, so you may not be in sexual sin anymore, but if you are angry, bitter, critical, all of things that you just mentioned, Jim, if you're in that, those are undealt with sins that need to be dealt with, because all of that all those openings; I'll just say it that way, I consider those things openings, it's like a pathway into sin again; that's where it's going to take you because it's unconquered, undealt with, and that's the whole idea of daily repentance. I start off my time with the Lord repenting even if I don't have anything specifically. I want to clear the garbage out and have a clear communication with my Abba, and the only way I know to do that is to repent of myself, and then I can enter into His presence.

Jim: Well you just said daily repentance and that should lead someone to conclude that there's not just repentance at the beginning of the Christian life. It's ongoing and even in the deeper repentance, it's not a ‘one and done’ thing. “I repented of my anger.” We may have to repent of our anger many times throughout our lives.

Kathy: So true, so true. How many times have I had to repent to the Lord for my fear, or for critical spirit, and those things that don't seem like a big deal to some people, those are the things that God has just gone after in me, and I'm so grateful to Him for it; but it is a painful process, and I think we get tired of it, we get tired of, how do you say it? I'll say it this way: you get tired of being dealt with. You get tired of seeing yourself. But the brokenness that comes through letting God show you, instead of ignoring it and pushing it aside, let Him shove it in your face, so to speak. Although He's a merciful and patient Father, He will still discipline you and correct you, and that is such a gift. I'm so grateful that the Lord does that, and I'm grateful for the brokenness that He's brought into my life, showing me what I am. I have long since given up any idea that I'm good, I know I'm not good, and if you have this attitude inside that you're good with God, that, to me, is a red flag that something's really off and you need to go back to square one and start over,  and really get before the Father and find out, because we're not good, we're never going to be good, and that's why I love the gift of repentance and why I love brokenness before my Father. He loves it. He loves a broken and contrite heart.

Jim: We just can't walk before Him without His grace, can we?

Kathy: That's right, that's right. We have to have Him.

Jim: Well, as we wrap up here today, what would you say to our listeners to encourage them to engage in this ongoing process of seeking a deeper repentance?

Kathy: Pray. Just go before Abba. I call him Abba every morning He's my Abba, my daddy, my father. And I ask, “show me, Lord, search me, search my heart and know my ways and reveal to me if there's any evil thing in me, and He does. And He's faithful and He's good. When God shows me, I don't feel beat up. I don't feel rejected. I feel loved, because it's coming from a loving Father who cares deeply about me.

Jim: Thank you so much for sharing your personal experience and for teaching us about the deeper repentance today.

Kathy: My pleasure, Jim. Thank you.

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In part 5 of our current series, we example the biblical foundation for worship and the Lord's desire that we worship Him.

We explain how we do worship at PLM, and discuss how God uses worship to transform men's lives and set them free from sin.

“Can the Ethiopian change his skin or the leopard its spots? Then may you also do good who are accustomed to do evil.” (Jeremiah 13:23)

Because of the people’s persistence in sin, the Lord spoke through the prophet Jeremiah…can the Ethiopian change his skin that is by nature black, or the Leopard his spots? The Israelites had served an apprenticeship to evil. They had been long accustomed to sin and had shaken off all restraints. Their consciences had been seared, and the habits of sin had been thoroughly entrenched.

How true this is for the men who come to us for help.

Four verses later, the Lord spoke again through Jeremiah, “I have seen your adulteries and your lustful neighings, the lewdness of your harlotry, your abominations on the hills in the fields. Woe to you, O Jerusalem! Will you still not be made clean?” (Jeremiah 13:27) Amazingly, the Lord’s offer of forgiveness and transformation still awaited them if they would only repent and be willing to change.

I can think back on many situations when a hopeless counselee sat in front of my desk, despondent and bemoaning, “I’ll never change” or “I’ve always been this way.” In fact, I once sat in that same chair, thinking the same thoughts, being bound for so many years in my own sin. Now having been set free for almost twenty years, those words don’t hold much water with me.

If we are going to begin this journey to experience God’s transforming power working in our lives, however, we must first understand that we are creatures of habit.

God Made Us Creatures of Habits

My first time behind the wheel of a car, I braved my way onto what we call in New York the Southern State Parkway. The car I was driving seemed as though it was two lanes wide. Fixated on the speedometer, mindful of all the floor pedals, and overcome with everything I had to do, I strained to keep this massive piece of machinery from lurching totally out of control. It was quite an experience to say the least.

Many driving experiences later, I could cruise down 5th Avenue in New York City, cabs darting here and there, an egg sandwich in my hand, coffee between my legs, shifting gears, navigating between the obstacles, not even thinking about what I was doing. How did that happen?

God gave man a marvelous capacity called habit. Whenever we do something long enough, it becomes part of us, or like second nature to us. It becomes an unconscious pattern. We perform highly complex behaviors without even thinking about them. It really is a gift from God. Imagine if you had to think through every little detail of what you do.

Here’s the problem. We are born with a sin nature, bent on pursuing sinful behaviors. Many of us have given over habitually to sin, to where it has become part of us. The Bible talks about a heart that has been trained in covetousness, one that has faithfully practiced coveting so much so that it has become second nature to do it. We sometimes look at what we have become and ask ourselves, how did this happen to me? My answer to you would be, by much practice.

So here now is the good news…it works both ways. We can’t avoid habitual living, but we can apply it to do what God tells us to do in His Word to where godliness becomes natural to us. Paul tells us to discipline ourselves for godliness. (1Timothy 4:7)

We Can Practice Godly Habits

Next, we must understand how to develop new godly habits. Consider Ephesians 4:22-24 which commands that we “put off, concerning your former conduct, the old man which grows corrupt according to the deceitful lusts, and be renewed in the spirit of your mind, and that you put on the new man which was created according to God, in true righteousness and holiness.” The process of change is begun by putting off sin and putting on godliness.

Just because we stop doing something doesn’t mean we have changed. A thief isn’t a thief anymore just because he isn’t stealing. He’s just a thief who isn’t stealing at the moment. Given the right circumstances and pressure, he is likely to revert back to his old habits. To commit to real change he must go out and get a job, and learn how to become a giver of what he has instead of being a taker.

As we obey God’s Word in this way, the Holy Spirit promises to “renew our mind,” the final and most decisive step in the journey of change. Over time, He will “renew” the way we think, what we think about, and, in fact, even what we desire. A proper word for all of this is sanctification, the process by which the Holy Spirit transforms our sin nature into Jesus’ glorious nature. “The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.” (Galatians 5:22-23)

Developing New Habits Take Time

The problem a lot of us have with this process is that it takes time and perseverance. My advice to you is don’t grow weary while doing good, for in due season you will reap if you don’t lose heart. (Galatians 6:9)

Allow me to share an illustration. A stone cutter hammers away at a rock. He might hit the rock a hundred times without so much as a crack showing. Then suddenly, at the 101st blow the rock splits in two. Was it the one blow that split the rock? Only in an immediate sense, as that one blow would have accomplished nothing if it were not for all that had gone before.

For some of you, sin is like a massive rock that blocks any growth you might otherwise have in the Lord. It seems impossible to break or even move. But the Lord promises a breakthrough and a renewing of our mind if we will only keep going.

Change is hard and takes endurance. Hebrews 10:36 says, “For you have need of endurance, so that after you have done the will of God, you may receive the promise.”

I know how it feels to be bound to the old man. Sin had become an unbreakable rock and an immovable mountain in my own life. But now, it fills my heart with thanksgiving and joy to proclaim from the mountaintops that there is an almighty grace that is able to change the leopard’s spots. And that grace is available to anyone who sees their need and seeks it earnestly through prayer and repentance.

The same prophet Jeremiah declares, “Ah, Lord GOD! Behold, You have made the heavens and the earth by Your great power and outstretched arm. There is nothing too hard for You.” (Jeremiah 32:17) Jesus Himself assures us, “The things which are impossible with men are possible with God.” (Luke 18:27)

Hallelujah! That’s not just hype; it’s the reality of what Jesus accomplished on Calvary for all who are bound in sin. Be encouraged, beloved, God is in the business of changing people.