Many men and women often believe marriage will fix a porn addiction. But our experience has shown this only leads to more hurt and pain.
We see it all too often. And we see it from both sides. There is the man who is struggling with sexual sin, with his addiction to pornography, but he thinks, “My problem will all go away when I get married.” Then there is the young woman who knows of her fiancé’s struggles, but she marries him anyway, thinking the same thing: “Marriage will fix him.” Today we answer the question “Should I Marry a Man Struggling with Porn?”
There is power to overcome sexual addiction, but it doesn't come from regular church attendance or obeying a list of rules.
For many Christians, living out their faith doesn’t go far beyond going to church on Sunday, not swearing, and not drinking alcohol. But is this all that defines a Christian? Is this what Jesus was talking about when he posed the question, “when the Son of Man comes, will He find faith on the earth?”
The Apostle Paul’s visit to Ephesus brought about a revival among its citizens characterized by wholehearted devotion to Christ. But what started as a pure and genuine following after the Lord became a faith in formalism, having the appearance of godliness but denying its power. Throughout the history of the Christian church, this downgrade of adoration is a common outcome for many revivals that lose that passionate pursuit of Jesus that marked their inception. Following suit, the American church has become a well-polished machine and its members have become more devoted to Christianity’s doctrines than to Christ Himself.
For the Christian addicted to porn, history cannot repeat itself. There IS power to overcome sexual addiction, but there’s more to it than consistent church attendance. If you’re desperate to be free of your sin, follow Steve Gallagher as he exposes the powerlessness of dead religious activity and encourages believers not to settle for an empty Christian existence.
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As Kathy watched Kathy Steve fight his addiction, she learned that human willpower alone wasn't enough to break the chains of sexual sin.
It seems reasonable to believe that if a person really wants to change, they will change.
In 1986, Steve Gallagher had a powerful experience of repentance and began fighting with all of his strength to find freedom from sexual sin. But it took him a long time, and there were repeated failures. At first, his wife Kathy thought this meant that he wasn’t actually serious about finding victory. But soon she began to realize that Steve was fighting a very powerful addiction, and that human willpower was not sufficient to break the spiritual chains of pornography addiction.
Sexual addiction may have been aided by a person's past experiences, but these have only served to strengthen the real root of the problem.
What is the root of sexual addiction? The answer is not what you are expecting.
In the age in which we live, our culture screams, “Live for self!” The avenues of which are seemingly endless. Advertisements galore call out to us and tell us that in order to be happy and fulfilled we must buy their product or be a part of their experience. Indulgence is not only offered, it is highly encouraged. More often than not, a life of simplicity is seen as strange and scoffed at.
Sexual addiction does not happen overnight. Though a person’s history may include circumstances beyond their control, being held captive to sin, especially pornography, is a process. While addictions vary, every addiction begins with a single experience and grows exponentially because of a lack of a person’s self-control. For the Christian stuck in porn, their hang-up is more the culmination of a life of self-centeredness than anything else.
So what does the Bible say about this kind of life? Steve Gallagher explains how his life was shaped by selfishness which primed him for an uncontrollable obsession with pornography and how understanding the role “self” plays in sexual addiction will lead the Christian into a life of true fulfillment and joy.
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Kathy shares the critical lesson that just because a husband has truly repented, doesn't mean everything will be perfect right away.
“If he really wanted to stop looking at porn, he would!” This kind of thinking seems very reasonable to a wife who has been hurt by many broken promises.
Kathy Gallagher thought this same thing once. Although Steve had a powerful experience of repentance and was fighting with all of his strength to gain freedom from sexual sin, it took him a long time to really get the victory. At first Kathy thought this meant that he wasn’t serious about changing, but she began to realize how powerful Steve’s addiction was, and that human willpower was not enough to break the spiritual chains of pornography addiction.
The fear of the Lord plays a vital role in overcoming porn addiction, but our church culture has robbed this concept of its true power.
What does the fear of the Lord have to do with overcoming an addiction to porn? It’s actually a very vital part of the process. The trend in our grace-saturated church culture is to limit the definition of “fear” to just reverence. While this is part of it, it’s surely not the whole.
Steve Gallagher takes on this critical topic and guides the struggling Christian into how true fear of God will set them on the path to freedom from sexual sin.
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"Devastated" doesn't come close to describing what a betrayed wife feels. But in prayer, she can enter in to a fight for her husband's soul.
When a Christian woman discovers that her husband is addicted to pornography, and has been lying to her for years, the word devastated doesn’t come close to describing how she feels. We want to suggest that there is good cause for her to get on her knees and begin to fight for her husband’s soul. Today we’re asking the question, “Why Should a Wife Fight for Her Marriage?”
Deliverance from porn addiction isn’t won merely through abstinence from technology. The battleground is within the heart.
Deliverance from porn addiction isn’t won merely through abstinence from technology. The battle ground is within the heart. Steve Gallagher explains why understanding this truth is pivotal for any Christian desperate to overcome sexual sin.
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Looking back on 35 years of marriage, Kathy can testify of God's goodness to her and the ways He worked good from the pain she endured.
Kathy’s marriage had been filled with pain and grief because of Steve’s addiction to pornography and infidelity. But God showed her that if she wanted to follow Him, it meant staying faithful to Steve and fighting for her marriage.
During a powerful encounter with God, Steve realized the utter sinfulness of his pornography and adultery. He began to fight with all his strength against the power of the addiction, and after intensely battling for a couple of years, Steve found freedom from sexual addiction. The couple soon began to throw themselves into helping other men and women find freedom from pornography and the pain of betrayal.
In this video, Kathy reflects on the past 35 years of her marriage and testifies of all God’s goodness to her. Not only did He reveal Himself to her, He restored her marriage and used all of the pain and suffering to bring about a harvest of good in the lives of many, many others.
We can easily identify numbers of Christian leaders who have fallen due to sexual sin. How does this happen to leaders in the church?
Nearly every Christian can name half a dozen ministry leaders of evangelical churches who have fallen due to sexual sin. How does this happen to men of God who are leaders in the church?
In this final installment in our series The Church Addicted, we'll look at the role of the leader, and ask what happens when a leader is compromised by sexual sin.
Kathy left Steve and things went from bad to worse. But God pursued her and asked her to return to her husband and fight for her marriage.
Kathy Gallagher’s marriage was in shambles. Her husband Steve was addicted to pornography and was cheating on her with other women.
Heartbroken, she desperately tried to get Steve to love her again. But things only grew worse. Eventually, she had enough and left Steve for another man. But God was pursuing her, and through a series of incredible circumstances, He made it very clear to her that if she wanted to follow Him, it meant returning to Steve and fighting for her marriage.
Over the next couple of years, Kathy learned from Jesus what it meant to selflessly love a man who had been addicted to pornography.
There's no doubt that spiritual warfare play a key role in the formation of an addiction to sex. But is a demon the cause of the addiction?
There's no doubt that spiritual warfare plays a key role in the formation of an addiction to sex. But is a demon the cause of the addiction? Steve Gallagher biblically defines what a stronghold is and how demonic activity manages to fortify them.
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