In this interview, biblical counselor Mark Shaw sits down with Nate to discuss the biblical role of a parent. He also shares how this impacts the way parents should seek to disciple a child caught in addiction. (From #410 For Parents: What is Your Biblical Role)

Nate: So Mark, you've been a biblical counselor for twenty years, and I'm sure in that time, you've had to help parents with issues they're dealing with in their kids' lives. That means you have to help them to fulfill their God-given role. But that makes me wonder, how many parents even have a clear understanding of the role that they're supposed to have in their children's lives. So, if you were talking to a parent that didn't know what their biblical role was, what would you say to them?

Mark: The first thing I think you would want to make clear to them is that the parents are really the first responders. They're the ones that God has made responsible for raising their children. He didn't give that duty to the church. Now the church can come in and help, but the parents are responsible for their children's spiritual condition. And you see that in the Shema, in Deuteronomy 6 and Ephesians 6 is another place where you see that in Scripture. Parents often think that schools are going to teach their children with education and that the church is going to teach their children when it comes to spirituality, but really they are both meant to be supplemental. The parents really are responsible for the education of their children and the spiritual growth of their children. So I think parents have to first start out and acknowledge the need to be actively engaged and involved in what's going on in their kids' lives because they will be held responsible before God for the way they parent.

Nate: In a perfect world, a parent would be able to completely eliminate any possibility that their child would be exposed to pornography or some other kind of sexual sin. But unfortunately in our world, that's just not possible. The statistics tell us it's going to happen at some point. If a child were to come and say, "I saw something," or, "I did something." You know and they're just weighed down with shame and guilt. How should a parent handle that initial confession of sin?

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Mark: I mean, it's been my experience that most parents typically don't handle it well. It can be shocking, it can be devastating, it can bring forth a lot of emotions. But it is a reality. I mean it used to be difficult to find a pornographic magazine. You had to work hard to do that, but these days, you could even find it on a can of green beans! There's pornographic images everywhere. So, the first thing you know in the home and even in the church, we need to not be so weird about sex and make it such an odd topic to not talk about it. I mean if we're not talking about it in the church, we know the world's talking about it. So a kid will be exposed and we need to be open and talk about it and talk about God's design for it. He designed our bodies to desire sex and pleasure, and it's good within His boundaries and context and it's outside of that where the guilt the shame enters in. And because their child has been engaging in some form of sexual behavior outside of those boundaries, they are likely feeling some of those things. And usually, the kid doesn't come forward. Usually a parent will catch them or whatever. So the reaction there has to be one of love and acceptance, of transparency, and that kind of thing. Yes there will be discipline, but not punishment. They need to have a mindset to say, "Hey let's tackle this together. Let's work on this together." I see it as the parent coming in and entering into the problem with the kid saying, "Hey, I'm willing to get involved and help you." Kids are afraid they're going to get restricted from their phone and all that and yes, there may be some restrictions that come, but if a parent can talk about it from the standpoint of discipline and not punishment, they won't be as likely to lose their kid. I think you lose a kid when you come down hard on them in punishment. And then you need to talk about the motivation and the why behind it. You know, why we do this and explaining that God has a better way revealed in His Word. So I think parents can help their kids to see it as something to save, that it's special, it's sacred, to save it for the spouse that God is going to give them. To help them see it as something they and their spouse can enjoy together. You know that's where parents can go with that without being so shocked and devastated. Like we said before, it's everywhere. We have a highly sexualized culture that kids are going to be influenced by. They're just going to be.

Nate: All right so let's wrap this up. I just want you to have a chance to talk to a parent whose kid, honestly, is already a long ways down the wrong road. What would you say to a parent who's in that situation?

Mark: I think parents are going to have to be radical. It's radical amputation. They're going to have to put restrictions in place, take the phone away. Restrict a kid's time and really evaluate their lives. There are going to have to be a lot of changes that will have to take place - not just in the kid's life, but in the whole family, maybe even cut cable TV. You know whatever you have to do, maybe put passwords on things that are PG-13 or whatever. Parents are going to have to get involved and maybe make some sacrifices themselves. They will need to create a, maybe even a Pure Life Ministries atmosphere in their own homes to help their kids get focused back on Christ.

Raising children in today’s culture brings parents face to face with unprecedented challenges. Sexually suggestive content is nearly everywhere we look, making it almost impossible to perfectly preserve the innocence of young children. Over the next five weeks we want to, as best we can, offer help for anyone who has seen their child fall victim to the snares of sexual sin.

We’ll look at the biblical role of a parent and how to respond the right way if your child has been in sin and how to walk with them through the process of repentance. Our first episode begins by looking at the reality of the world our children are growing up in and what the effects are of growing up in a lust-driven culture.

Brokenness isn't something that's talked about much anymore, but it is essential for true restoration and healing. It is the mark of every heart that has had a true sight of the Cross and of the mercy of God in their lives. In this interview from our archives, Mike Johnston discusses with Jeff Colon about the importance of poverty of spirit and what true brokenness looks like.

Mike: Jeff, it's great to see you again thanks for coming in.

Jeff: Thanks, Mike; it's good to see you.

Mike: Jeff, as we continue our discussions in i: the root of sin exposed, we want to talk today about poverty of spirit, and let me just begin by asking this question: how critical is poverty of spirit in the life of a believer?

Jeff: Well Mike without poverty of spirit our Christian walk is founded on sand because this really is the first thing in the process that God needs to do in our lives. I could say it this way: it's the foundation, really, that everything else rests upon.

Mike: Well it is the opposite of pride, of course, and we deal with pride constantly as we work with men coming out of sexual sin. But really that's just the natural human condition for everybody; we're by nature prideful. How do we begin to come into a poverty of spirit which is, as you said, the foundation even of our very salvation?

Jeff: Well if we define poverty of spirit it really is just when we come to an end of our self and come into the reality that my situation is helpless; there's nothing I can do to save myself. And, really, only the Holy Spirit can make that real to us. Jesus said, “When the Spirit comes, he will convict the world of sin,” and that really is what happens initially when the Holy Spirit impresses that upon someone's heart. Whether we're praying for that person or God just intervenes in their life, and they come into the reality that “I am lost; there is no hope for me; I have nothing but the mercy of God to help me.”

Mike: You know, Jeff, there are many people who I wouldn't necessarily classify as a believer, a follower of Christ, someone who's truly been converted, but surely they have some sense that they are needful, that things aren't going well for them, that they see things wrong inside of themselves; but that in and of itself really isn't enough to enter into the kingdom of God. What else is required?

Jeff: Well I think about my own testimony: I remember when I, myself, came to that place when I was bound by drugs and sexual sin and God had intervened in my life. I knew my life was out of control, I knew I needed help, and I remember going to church with my sister. I remember as I look back at that time, I saw my need, but I wasn't ready to relinquish my life in this world or the things of this world; my self-will wasn't broken. I wanted help but I still wanted my life as I knew it, and that's not what true brokenness consists of.

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Mike: I would imagine as I could say was true for me, was true for you also, that even though you saw those things in your life that, if you were to see some other people around you, you could probably find others that you thought, maybe you were a little bit better than them, and maybe that gave you some sense of hope. I know we hear people all the time saying, “well I think I'm going to make it into the kingdom of God because after all you know I'm not as bad as this person or that person.” Jesus had something to say about seeing our need that way.

Jeff: That's true Mike, it really is tragic. I know from my own life… I went on for years thinking I had really come to God, but really, I came with more of a worldly sorrow. Yeah, I was tired of my circumstances, but like you just said, I wasn't that bad of a guy, I just had some issues in my life that were causing it all. What I think about is the example that Jesus gives us where the 2 men go up to the temple to pray, and one goes up and all he does is share his accolades of all he has done for God: he tithes, he goes to church regularly, and he's really a devout man and sees himself, probably, as an asset to God. But this other man can't even lift his eyes to God; all he can do is beat his breast and cry out “God have mercy on me, a sinner.” It's obvious when you look at these 2 men: one was in the utter reality of his desperate need for God; he was a sinner—he didn't just have some issues in his life—he was a sinner through and through, and he understood that his only hope was “God, have mercy on me.” When in contrast, the Pharisee saw his good works and justified himself before God.

Mike: You know as we look at that example that Jesus gave us in the context of the modern church that pharisee would have been seen as an outstanding church member.

Jeff: Yeah absolutely and we all can put on an outward form, but God is more interested in what's going on in the heart.

Mike: But you know the flip side of that is you take that person who is truly broken and stick him in too many, unfortunately, churches today and the 1st thing people are going to want to do is rush up to him and try to encourage him not to see himself that way.

Jeff: Yes that’s true; we almost don't want people to feel bad about their sin anymore, but that really is a precursor to coming to the Lord in a real way and really coming into true salvation. Unless that happens, we're never going to understand the realities of the Cross and the mercy that God has had on us; in that state, really, the whole blessed thing about it is we look up and realize there is mercy.

Mike: Well that is the blessedness of poverty of spirit.

Jeff: It is, you know, it's not a morbid, horrible thing that... I'm just in this state of seeing my sin and bemoaning what I'm like, but in that reality, I realize there is hope that Jesus died for that and he's willing to take my wretchedness upon Himself and I can be forgiven, that is the blessedness of poverty.

Mike: You know I look at the men that come into our Residential Program, Jeff, and you just watch this happen for them—I can say it's part of my testimony; a part of yours—for the 1st time in their lives, they really get a sense of how desperately needy they are for a Savior, and I can say for the 1st time in my life how beautiful he appeared through the lens of that need. So if you don't have that sense of need you're never going to see Jesus as He really is.

Jeff: It's so true Mike. The reality of the cross will never be unveiled to the person who hasn't come to the sight of his utter wretchedness and need for God. I know for myself that's when the cross became everything to me.

Mike: Well, Jeff, no doubt there may be some people listening today who, if they really evaluated their relationship with the Lord, they would have to acknowledge that they've never had that experience of really being broken and seeing that deep need. What should they do to have that?

Jeff: Well, Mike we can't see it on our own as I said when we started; we need the Holy Spirit to really make that real, but if we're sincere, and we want that kind of brokenness, I'll encourage guys sometimes pray over Psalm 51. Ask God to make those words that David prayed when he was broken and in sight of his need, “make that real to me Lord; God help me; Lord I want to be broken, God I want to see my heart the way you see it.” If we cry out to God like that, he's going to answer that prayer, he's going to help us by His Holy Spirit to see what we need to see about ourselves.

Mike: That is our testimony; he's done that for us, and we can surely sit here and say it wasn't us, it was the Lord who did it for us and that's his heart—Praise the Lord. Well, Jeff thank you so much for talking to us today about poverty of spirit.

Jeff: Thanks Mike.

After years of living an outwardly good Christian life, Lyndell’s faith had crumbled, leaving her wide open to the devil’s lies. One personal tragedy after another breathed despair into her very soul, and she began searching for comfort in the place she swore she would never go: adultery. If you haven’t listened to part one of her story already, first check out episode #407.

This week, she recounts her journey back to God along the road of repentance. It wasn’t easy, but God faithfully taught her where she went wrong, and showed her that He can make all things work for the good of those who love Him. You can find Lyndell’s book by visiting amazon.com. Just search for Confessions of an Adulterous Christian Woman.

If you are a woman who is struggling with sexual sin in any form, we would encourage you to check out our Overcomers-At-Home Program where you can receive counseling to help you break free from the bonds of sexual addiction. Just go to purelifeministries.org to find out more information. You’ll also find all our teaching materials there, including Create in Me a Pure Heart by Kathy Gallagher.

Purity for Life is a production of Pure Life Ministries.

Kathy Gallagher knows firsthand the devastation and pain a husband's betrayal causes. But in this interview she looks at the blessings that come from trials and helps answer the question everyone who has suffered is tempted to ask: Why did God let this happen to me?

Mike: Kathy, the letter we want to deal with today is from Shirley, and Shirley is expressing something that many of us have asked, and it really can be boiled down to this: "why has God allowed this to happen to me?" Shirley is feeling like she's been abandoned by God. How would you respond to her?

Kathy: I like to share a little of my own testimony answer that question, Mike, because every woman I've ever dealt with has asked the same question: "why did God let this happen to me?" All women marry men that we love, and we marry those men believing that they're going to be our life partner, that we're going to have this wonderful loving relationship; we're going to have children... You know, I mean, it's not a fairy tale or a fantasy, it's real. You expect all that to happen, so when you get into the process of marriage and you begin to find out that there's unfaithfulness, that completely shatters all of a woman's dreams. "Lord, you knew," I can't tell you how many times I've heard that, "God you knew what he was doing when I married him, why did you allow this to happen?" And I said that many times myself; I just couldn't make sense of why God allowed me to marry Steve Gallagher. I was on fire for Christ I mean, I was a soul winner; it was exciting, it was dynamic; I was in love with Jesus Christ, He was in love with me. But within days finding out that Steve was in sexual sin—horrible stuff.

Mike: It's the age-old question: "why does God allow bad things to happen to good people?"

Kathy: At least in my life, Mike, all I can say, and I've counseled this for many years; because you can't make sense of this in the natural and it doesn't make any sense. But in the spiritual it makes a lot of sense because God uses suffering primarily to carve out of us habits and attitudes and sin that nothing else can get at. Finding out my husband was in sexual sin was the worst thing that could have happened to me, but it brought out things in me that I did not know were in there. Of course, I would have been happy to spend the rest of my life not even dealing with that stuff; I would have been happy to just have a mediocre Christianity and a mediocre marriage. That would have been fine for me, but God wasn't satisfied with that. I've been married 29 years, and I look back on those years and what I see is a long history of God's faithfulness, maybe not Steve's faithfulness, but I saw God's faithfulness and what I would say to Shirley and a lot of other women who have found themselves in that same predicament: feeling like "God, why did you let this happen to me?" God's letting it happen because he's refining, and, ladies, we need it just as much as the men do, and I think that we struggle a lot with that as women; we feel like victims when we found out that our husbands have been unfaithful. And we are, to a certain degree, we are victims of someone else's awful behavior. And yet, you can either choose to let God use it in your life and fashion you and mold you or you can become bitter, hard-hearted, divorce this jerk and move on, but you're going to have to deal with stuff. If you really belong to the Lord something is going to have to go in and deal with these issues.

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Mike: How do you ultimately deal, Kathy, with that very real feeling that you've been abandoned by God? It is a real feeling that you have.

Kathy: Yeah, it's very real but you know, Mike, all I can say, if you have truly been converted; you know in your heart of hearts that God is good, no matter what; you know that and it's real. This nation has created a nation of people who are very spoiled, and we have a very high expectation in marriage. So when something interferes with that, we immediately turn to God and start questioning God. The Lord is allowing things to happen in our lives because he's trying to get at things in us that nothing else will get to, and that's why I feel like sexual sin, as bad and awful as it is, and, you know, I get upset when I hear the stories of what men do to their families; it breaks my heart—but you're in that situation and you have to say in your heart "God you are for me, you are with me, and you're going to do something; you're going to bring about good through this."

Mike: One of the things that you said, you described the attributes, or the character, of God. How often do you think it's the problem that some of these women simply do not know what the character of God is and maybe they need to spend more time in the Word of God getting to know him so that they do know, not only what his promises are, but who he is.

Kathy: Right; and that was my problem in the beginning because I was still very young when all this broke, and I was just a new Christian, and I didn't know the Lord at all. Part of what happened for me when I found out about Steve's sin after I realized how much I needed God, I ran to His word to find answers for my marital problems but what I found was a God of mercy and compassion that's what I ran into, and I found a side to God that, again, I would never have known the Lord the way I know him, if I hadn't gone through what I've been through.

Mike: Amen. Kathy, I hope that'll be an encouragement and hopefully some direction to women who may feel abandoned by God.

Kathy: Thanks so much thanks Mike.

Lyndell Holtz grew up surrounded by godly examples. She had a powerful experience with the Lord as a young girl and developed strong convictions about what was right and what was wrong. In college she married a man named David and they entered into a life of full-time ministry. She thought this was the blueprint for happiness. But fast forward 20 years later and she would be depressed and doubting, still aching for happiness. It was these things that allowed the enemy to lead her to a place she swore she would never go – an adulterous relationship. But you’ll also hear how God took what the devil meant for evil and turned it for great good – in her own life, and in the lives of others.

You can purchase a copy of Lyndell’s book by visiting amazon.com. Just look for Confessions of an Adulterous Christian Woman. Purity for Life is a production of Pure Life Ministries. If you are a woman who is struggling with sexual sin in any form, we would encourage you to check out our Overcomers-At-Home Program where you can receive counseling to help you break free from the bonds of sexual addiction. Just go to purelifeministries.org to find out more information. You’ll also find all our teaching materials there, including Create in Me a Pure Heart by Kathy Gallagher.

Even the spirit of this world can sense the destructive path mankind is on and that it cannot continue this way forever, that there must come an end to the horrors we see growing every day. Yet, it is deluded as to the true nature of the problem, that 6000 years ago we declared war against a Holy God. The world is trying to evade the inevitable end to this battle by seeking solutions to save itself apart from the gospel God has laid before us. But the end will come for the Children of Adam, and when it does, it will catch many by surprise. Then, we will all be brought before the judgment seat of God and the question presented to us shall be: Are we standing in The Truth? This is the final episode of our special series, World  of Lies, based on the latest book by Steve Gallagher:

Walking in Truth in a World of Lies. We would encourage you to get a copy and immerse yourself in its biblically based truth. Just visit aworldoflies.org to find out more information. Purity for Life is a production of Pure Life Ministries. You can find all of our teaching materials, by visiting purelifeministries.org. You can also find out about our residential and phone-counseling programs if you or someone you care about is trapped in the deception of sexual sin.

In a recent interview with Glenn and Jessie Meldrum, they spoke on the sad decline of the church in America. Part of that interview touched on the fact that prayer and Bible study are vital elements of a true and strong Christian life. If you're a new Christian, this will help you to see how you can do this and just why it is so important.

Nate: I've been studying the Bible for 12 years, and I know that probably the 1st 5 years as a new believer were very painful—just difficult—because it showed me how little I really knew. I mean there's this... once you actually start to study the Word of God or start to really have a life of prayer, you realize how little you know; there's just this vast world that's opening up before you… For a new believer who wants to make a commitment to spending quality time studying the Bible and being in prayer, what encouragement would you give to them?

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Glenn: Well I guess one of the things I would say is you're never going to know the joy of fellowship with God til you begin to put yourself in place for that. I've given the illustration before: it's like I have a big piece of chocolate cake and you've never even eaten chocolate in your life, much less chocolate cake. How do you describe chocolate cake to somebody who doesn't know what it is? It's like trying to explain to a blind man that has been blind his whole life what blue is, you know, this color blue. You don't have a point of reference. You really don't know until you begin to taste and see that God is good—until you begin to understand. So when a person comes to salvation they are having some kind of encounter with God (or they're not coming to salvation; if there's not an encounter with God then there's no salvation. If there isn't some form of spiritual revolution that's happening in their life that's changing them then, you know, they're just having sentimental ideas.) But when they begin to have an encounter with God, there should be enough understanding that should cause them to begin to press in, to go in, to start learning the place of prayer and the only way you're going to learn how to pray is to pray I mean you got to do it.

Now there are good books out there: E.M. Bounds, Andrew Murray, other ones that are out there that are really good books on prayer; but you're not going to know prayer from reading a book. You're gonna know prayer from going to the place of prayer and learning how to communicate with God. And a part of prayer that I think is so important is a place of learning how to enjoy God; just learning how to be in a spot where you just love being with him, and that's what praise is all about. So when you look at the Lord's Prayer, or the "Our Father," however people want to call it, you know, it begins with praise, ends with praise and then in between is our petitions. I don't believe we're supposed pray the Lord's Prayer verbatim; it's an outline of what prayer should consist of, but it's that place of enjoying God, the place of praise where we start knowing that intimate fellowship and it's not going to be so much in the place of making our petitions known. Sometimes we commune in the place of intercession where we’re praying for others or an individual and you are really burdened over that person and you are experiencing God in the midst of that intercession, but usually it's in the place of worship and prayer that you really do it. So I would really recommend that a new believer, or a believer that has never come to the place of maturity in their life that they begin just to put themselves at the feet of Jesus, and if you try and make it by time and chance—whenever it happens—it's not going to happen. It has to be this purposeful discipline that comes in your life where you are saying, "I've got to take time with Jesus; he is worth my investment."

That's where so much of the problem is—what I had referred to earlier in the Church of Ephesus forsaking their first love—you know we ultimately forsake the first love because we don't spend time with Jesus anymore. We start moving away and we don't see him as infinitely valuable, we just don't think it's that important so we neglect prayer, but in the neglect of prayer, or never learning the place of prayer and worship, what happens is we move further and further away from him. Then we just think it to be a dead religion, or just ritual, or whatever, because there's no life in it, and so, it really has to be this place of hungering for him and then putting ourselves in the place of prayer. And second would be that place of the study of the Word. There, again, you can't make it time and chance—you have to do it, and if you don't make it the purposeful thing to learn the word of God, then you're not going to understand what's there. And somebody can go and start reading the Bible right from the beginning through the end and that's fine, but they're going to come the place where they just say I have no idea what's being taught and, well, you just keep going because a little bit later you'll find something that does make sense and as you mature you come and begin to understand a little bit more and you'll understand why some things were there and there may be points in your life where you just say I have no idea why that's in the Bible, period. So you go on and you understand what you can and that's why, especially for new believers, I recommend staying in the New Testament, and especially in the Gospels to get to know Jesus. The Word of God needs to become something that's real and vibrant. When we understand Jesus, we will begin to understand the Old Testament that's pointing to Him.‍

Jessie: I would just add that there's things we have to do that seem like a sacrifice but Jesus never made it easy. He's made statements like "deny yourself, take up the cross, fall into the ground and die, lose your life." So when he's telling us that we have to have a life in him, we have to know him through prayer and the word, getting under good teaching, it doesn't maybe feel good; it doesn’t. It really feels like, "you know this isn't going to be fun" or "I'd rather look at screens instead of this," especially like this younger generation. I mean I felt it: when I got saved I was glued to television and they were always going. We had at least 3 televisions going on in my home all the time, constantly, so I know, a little bit anyway, what that feels like when you get saved, and you know something has to happen—you need to pull away from this... So I kept trying to ease away from the television and spend time with God, but it didn't work and then, I think I was saved like 9 months, and I heard a message; somebody preached on prayer and said "can you not give Jesus one hour of your life each day?" and it just hit me like, "doesn't, yeah, doesn't he deserve that?" So from that day it was "Ok, I'm just going to give him..." and it was hard at first, but God started meeting with me and then eventually the hour... it's not enough time. I need more time with him and as I just cut off T.V... I couldn’t limit myself, so I just cut it off, and in time it's like wow I don't even miss it; I don't even know what's on television. For Glenn and I it's been years since we've watched television, and we haven't missed anything, we're not like sitting around in the evenings going "I wonder what people are watching," it's just not even part of life. So there's a point where it feels like sacrifice at first, it feels like denying yourself; but just press through. You do this, you seek Him; He does reward those who diligently seek Him, and it becomes just normal. You have to have it, you can't get through a day without prayer.

There is a spiritual war being waged against your soul. Whether you are aware of it or not, the enemy has many weapons and strategies aimed at breaking through the walls of our heart and bringing in the vilest pollutions that will destroy us from within. He is ruthless and will assail us with a barrage of lies through culture and media until we cannot resist his temptations. But something else puts our souls in eternal danger. There is a traitor in our very midst: our own flesh. Our hearts are desperately wicked, and every day, as we seek to stand against the tides of deception raging against us, we must also restrain this traitor from his constant attempts to open the gate and surrender to our enemy. We must be willing to root out the traitor and put him to death or risk our hearts being overthrown.

In this interview from our archives,  Mike Johnston, Bill Lucas, and Kathy Gallagher show that the healing, restoration, and forgiveness we long for in our lives can only come to us as we see our deep need for God to renew our hearts. (From #385 - The Right Way to Give Up)

Mike: We want to talk today about biblical forgiveness. It is at the core of our faith, and the core of our relationship with the Lord. Bill I want to start with you. One of the things that I know we see in the men coming to us for counseling is that an understanding of our forgiveness requires that we have sight of our need. Talk to us a little bit about that.

Bill: Well, in the area of sexual sin, guys come to us believing they only have just one little problem. They believe that they're going to come in and deal with this problem and get on with life. It's the reality of my life that God opened my eyes to the wickedness of my heart and how it had completely affected my whole life: my living, how I acted, what I did. So, as we expose that to the men, they they realize that their one little problem of sexual sin is actually not their primary need. The greater need is that they have a heart problem which contains every aspect of their life. You can't put one little problem in a system and it not affect the whole system.

Mike: Another way to look at it is that the outward sins that we see are really a manifestation of the heart issues. They're really growing out of the deeper heart issues.

Kathy: I was thinking about how if you don't understand the nature of sin, then it's hard to grasp the nature of your need. I remember when I got saved, all I knew was that there was something so desperately wrong with everything about me and that if I died, I would be separated from God. Somehow I just knew that inside. My need was enormous. Our heart is corrupt through and through, and that's what God is trying to deal with. It's not the symptoms He wants to deal with.

Mike: Let's take it down one more level. You may not have ever dealt with sexual sin. In fact you may see yourself as a pretty good person. We can all compare ourselves to other people. We can always find other people that make us look pretty good on the outside. But, when we're dealing with issues of faith, the truth is in the Word of God and the Word of God says that there is no good thing in me. I can be a church-goer all my life and I can have a gold star on my church attendance. I can be outwardly kind to other people. I can be a very humble person in my personality, but the Bible says it doesn't matter. There's no good thing in us because we've all been terribly corrupted by sin. Whether it's outwardly communicated to others or whether is just secretly in the heart, we are all desperately without hope when it comes to our sin.

Kathy: The corruption that came through the fall belongs to all of mankind. No one has been excluded from it. We are all corrupt inwardly. With forgiveness, God doesn't forgive just specific sins and that's not what our need is. We don't need God to forgive us specifically of certain sins. We need the whole of God's love and forgiveness to come over who we are in our natures. Our nature is corrupt and that's what the issue is.

Bill: I think one of the biggest enemies towards seeing need is being naturally good-natured. The person who is naturally good will struggle tremendously seeing a spiritual need. A lot of people rate themselves by all the good they do.

Kathy: The rich young ruler who was a perfect example of that. He came to Jesus saying, "I've kept all of the commandments, all of my life. What do I need to do to inherit eternal life?" The whole argument was ridiculous to the Lord. Of course, He didn't come across that way, but there's none good.

Mike: Going along with that story. For the sake of argument, Jesus was assuming that what the young man had said was true and with the right motive. You know, Jesus kind of gave the man the benefit of the doubt and said, "Okay. Now go and sell everything you have and give it to the poor." Jesus knew there was a heart issue in this man. He loved his money. It was his security and that man went away sad, because there was a heart issue. And that's really our point today. All of us have heart issues, no matter how outwardly good we may appear to be. Bill, share a little bit with us, because I know this is the first step for a man coming to our program, and for really anyone. Once they've gotten a sight of how desperately needy they are, what happens in their relationship with the Lord and what the Lord is offering them?

Bill: As they see their need, the next step is that gratitude should grow in their lives of what Christ has done. Only Jesus can bring that forgiveness and fulfill our need. As we recognize that, gratitude starts to well up and also hope. It's amazing that when someone's eyes are opened to the greatness of God and what He has done, how He has paid a great price, hope grows that God can really restore you.

Kathy: Humility as well is what I think of. When you get a sight of who you are and what God has done, all you can do is fall down and worship. When you really get a sight of what you are and what you've done and what you deserve, but see how Jesus took the wrath of God for you, it's like wow!

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Mike: The forgiveness of God is so tremendous. In fact, when you really get a sight of it, it's almost unbelievable. I don't know how to say it in the right way, I just have trouble getting my arms around the fact that God has really forgiven me!

Kathy: What's even more amazing, words don't do it justice, but He lives in me. He is ever-present and He is now here and near.

Mike: And he couldn't unless he had forgiven us.

Bill: I tell the guys what it says in the Bible, if the Spirit of God is in you, then you have been given a Spirit of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. It's just so tremendous to know that when the truth starts becoming real about our relationship with this awesome God, this mighty God, who has forgiven us, it's humbling. You see how much you lack and how much he has.

Mike: That's a wonderful way to put it. I'm an empty well and He is an overflowing fountain of whatever I need. He's overflowing with it. Well, let's talk about a third thing as we wrap up today. As an individual sees his need and as he gets a sight of God's forgiveness, how does that affect his relationship with other people?

Bill: At first in our Residential Program, we tell the men who come to us what it's like to live around people with a mind focused on giving to others. As you begin to see what God has done for you, what else can you do than to express that towards others? There are many Scriptures to back that up, but I think of Romans 2:1 that gives the impression, if you become a judge, what you're doing is you're looking in a mirror and you're just seeing another person. I tell the guys this: when you get a sight of what you're like and who Christ is, you have compassion for others and allow them room and you learn to forgive others.

Mike: I put it this way, it's very difficult to look down on other people when you're down where you need to be. Because all you can do is look up.

Bill: And God is big, when you're at your right spot, you see God is so much bigger, and it's so real that when we're in our right place, we can really look to God and just trust Him. We can be compassionate towards others. We can forgive others just like the Bible says, and God does truly provide our every need. He is there. He will guide our steps. He does what His Word says.

KG: Only the power of God can give the human heart the ability to say, "I forgive you." But he will give it to you.

We’ve come to a critical point in our series, World of Lies. So far, we’ve discussed how deception works and why it’s so dangerous to the Christian. We’ve looked at how our culture is constantly feeding us ungodly messages and seen that even the church is filled with proponents of these same lies. Now we turn and begin examining how to really Walk in Truth in a World of Lies. Today we look at the first part of that process. It begins with a choice that every one of us must make at some point in our lives. This choice is much like the one God asked Abraham to make. He had to choose to forsake his life in a pagan nation, leave everything he had ever known, and to go to a land God would show him. God is asking each one of us to make that same choice, trusting Him, like Abraham, to bring us to a better land. So, will you heed the call, and once and for all Forsake the Land of Deception?

There is a spiritual war being waged against your soul. Whether you are aware of it or not, the enemy has many weapons and strategies aimed at breaking through the walls of our heart and bringing in the vilest pollutions that will destroy us from within. He is ruthless and will assail us with a barrage of lies through culture and media until we cannot resist his temptations. But something else puts our souls in eternal danger. There is a traitor in our very midst: our own flesh. Our hearts are desperately wicked, and every day, as we seek to stand against the tides of deception raging against us, we must also restrain this traitor from his constant attempts to open the gate and surrender to our enemy. We must be willing to root out the traitor and put him to death or risk our hearts being overthrown.